How to Absolutely Guarantee a Long and Prosperous Life on Planet Earth

We are asking and answering the question, how does one live a long and prosperous life? The answer is found in Ephesians six as it relates to children’s interaction with their parents. When children obey their parents, long life and prosperity are the results. And here is where some problems arise. In 2002, only 9 percent of adults said the children they saw in public were respectful toward adults. In 2004, more than one of three teachers considered leaving their profession or knew another teacher who quit. The reason? students’ “intolerable behavior.” So said Public Agenda, a nonprofit and nonpartisan research group. In 2005, 70 percent of people surveyed said, “People are ruder than they were 20 or 30 years ago.” Among the worst offenders were children, said an Associated Press-Ipsos poll. The reason, experts say, is because of what parents expect from kids. “The pressure to do well is up. The demand to do good is way down.” Dan Kindlon, a child psychologist at Harvard University, believes most parents want considerate, polite, well-behaved children. “But they’re too tired, worn down by work, and personally needy to take up the task of teaching them proper behavior at home,” Kindlon says. He says present-day parenting has more to do with training boys and girls to compete in school or on the soccer field, but competition doesn’t teach civility. “Parents are out of control,” says Dr. Alvin Rosenfeld, a child psychiatrist. “We always want to blame the kids, but if there’s something wrong with their incivility, it’s the way their parents model for them. ¹ I just didn’t get to it

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Children are to submit to their parents in the home. This is God’s order and it is right and true for if a man does not know how to take care of his home, he cannot take care of the church of God.

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Question: How has your home life changed since you have practiced God’s divine order for the home? Share your story in the comments section below.

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We are currently teaching in the book of Ephesians. You can click on the links below to listen to some of these podcasts.

About Emery

Emery committed his life to the Lord Jesus Christ over 45 years ago and has served as both a full-time pastor and an itinerant minister. He and his wife Sharon of 40 years emphasize personal growth and development through the Word of God. The ministry of the Holy Spirit is the focus and the hallmark of their mission. Read more about them here.

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Podcast Notes

Prosperous Long Life: What The Scriptures Say

Ephesians 6:1–4 (ESV) — 1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Notice the phrase, “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”
That’s a quote from the Old Testament.

Exodus 20:12 (ESV): — “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.

What we just read in Ephesians six is that this was the first commandment with a promise.
In other words, this is the first of the Ten Commandments that had a promise attached to it.
So, children obeying their parents is a concept that transcends both covenants.
It’s mentioned in both new and old.
If we take heed to these verses, then things will go well with us.
That’s a Bible fact and since it is, it’s worthy to know the ins and outs of how and why this is so.
Meaning there is a blessing from God that should be gleaned.
That blessing is conditional — it’s based on how children treat their parents.
What is this blessing?
Things will go well with you is what the scripture says — If things are going well, of course, that points to being prosperous.
Ephesians six also says that this kind of reverential respect for parents leads to long life on planet earth.
So with this truth comes a self-evident fact: we can do some things to extend our lives on planet earth and there are some things that we can do to cut it short.
Long life is not left up to genetics — it’s left up to obedience to the Word.
This destroys the idea that you have a set time to live on planet earth and that when your time is up, you’re gone.
That’s not scriptural and this passage here is just one of several in the Bible along this line.
Let’s say it again, there are things you can do to extend your life, and similarly, there are unwise activities that can shorten it.

Submission and Authority and Long Life

So, as we look at Ephesians, verses one through four, we must understand what the pericope is.
But, just because we have a chapter break, that is we’ve gone from chapters five to six does not mean that the thread Paul has been sharing has changed.
The line of thought that Paul has undertaken goes all the way back to verse eighteen of Ephesians five.

Ephesians 5:18–21 (ESV): — 18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but [be filled with the Spirit,] 19 addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, 20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.

The line of thought here in chapter six is still ‘being filled with the Spirit.’
We know what the characteristics are of those who are filled — that is we can tell if a person is full.
These traits are as follows:
- Psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs
- Singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord.
- Giving thanks in Jesus’ Name unto God
- Submitting to one another out of respect for Jesus.
Submitting to one another is the last part that Paul spins off of and expands.
He first starts with the submission of husbands and wives in the home.
And now, in chapter six, we have children who are to submit to their parents in the home.

Long and Prosperous Life: Being in Submission

If you remember from a previous podcast, we broke down the word submission.
The word submission consists of two parts – sub and mission.
Sub, means to be under something.
For example, a submarine is ‘under’ the water where marine life is.
So, submission means to be under the mission of.
Children obey your parents in the Lord for this is right.
What is the Spirit of God saying to children?
Children be ‘under the mission’ of your parents.
Again, if there is no defined mission, that can be problematic.
So, parents, what is the plan?
What is the mission?
And with that thought, here is the Illustration of the Day.
This illustration comes from John Cionca, who was at one point in his life, the associate dean for student affairs at Bethel Theological Seminary, St. Paul, Minnesota.
This is what he wrote on the idea of becoming a ‘Dad of Purpose.’

Last week I changed brake pads, fixed a toilet, sealed the driveway, and hung wallpaper. There’s nothing wrong with getting the most out of each day. In fact, the Bible tells us that there is a time for everything under the sun. Housework is important, recreation is beneficial, but in the midst of all my worthwhile activities, I must remember the words: “Beware of the barrenness of a busy life.” My children need the legacy of a dad whose life is directed by a clear purpose. They must see more than just an effective executive managing daily demands. While a treat at the Dairy Queen is a good investment, they also need to see my check written for hunger relief overseas. While playing catch in the backyard is enjoyable, they must also sense the joy I feel when praising God in a spontaneous song. I want Ben and Betsy to recognize the overarching purpose in my life, the primary goal that gives meaning to daily particulars. Whether we’re playing trumpets, painting a widow’s house, or helping at the church, I hope they discover my main purpose in life is to honor God through praise and service.[John R. Cionca, Discipleship Journal September/October 1988]

This illustrates this idea of being ‘under the mission of’ or submission.
So, you see there must be a mission to submit to.

Submission to the Great Commission

With all that being said, what’s the goal or the target that parents need to shoot at when it comes to raising children?
There’s an overall goal we find in the Great Commission.

Matthew 28:16–20 (ESV) — 16 Now the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain to which Jesus had directed them. 17 And when they saw him they worshiped him, but some doubted. 18 And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

That’s the main mission — to make disciples of all nations.
How do we get there?
You backtrack from what it takes to make a strong nation.
A strong nation is made up of strong churches.
A strong church is made up of strong families.
Here we are back to home life.
The mission to make strong disciples starts in the home — it starts here in Ephesians six – one 1 through four.
So, here’s the admonition: raise children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, and do it in such a way that you do not provoke them to anger.

Long and Prosperous Life: Obey Your Parents

Let’s start with verse one, our children’s part of this mission.

Ephesians 6:1 (ESV): Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

Children are to obey their parents — that is the right thing.
The Greek word ‘obey’ is the one we want to look at, and with that thought, here is the Definition of the Day.
The word ‘obey’ means to ‘hear under the authority of.’
Hear under the authority of means is to hear the authority that’s over them — which is the parents.
If you remember, and if you don’t we’ll go back over it again, the word hear in Hebrew doesn’t just mean to take something into your ears.
Hearing and doing or synonymous terms.
And, that’s what this word obey is pointing to.
Obedience and hearing are one thing.
Children, if you heard your parents say something, but you did the opposite thing, then you really didn’t hear them — that’s what the Bible is saying.
If you really hear, you really obey.
So, obeying speaks of the one hearing as being under the authority of someone else.²
Children, obey your parents in the Lord.
Now, what does that mean ‘obey in the Lord?’
‘In the Lord’ doesn’t just mean that the parents are in the Lord – that’s already understood because Paul is writing to believers anyway.
They are already in the Lord.
No, ‘in the Lord’ means that the child obeys His parents because of the Lord.
We could say it another way, hopefully, this makes it clear.
A child can yield in obedience because of the child’s relationship with their parents, but that’s not enough.
A child should also obey because they have a relationship with the Lord.
This double relationship is in place because parents have exposed their children to the things of God.

Start Right Away

Understanding that the first five years in this process is critical.
Start raising children in God right from birth.
In fact, start while the baby is in the womb.
Sing songs of praise — the child that’s in your womb will hear and respond.
Quote Bible verses out loud.
The baby in your womb will hear God’s Word coming out of your mouth.
Start this ‘raising children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord’ right away: you can’t emphasize this enough.

Long and Prosperous Life: ‘For This Is Right’

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

The word right here does not just mean correct.
It means righteous.
Children yielding in obedience to their parents is a righteous thing.
It’s part of righteousness being established as the norm in the universe.
There is no turning from this.
Society cannot redefine righteousness.
Righteousness is all God’s definition.
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

Long and Prosperous Life: Honor and Long Life

2 “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise),

The word ‘honor’ is extremely vital to this whole discussion of children obeying their parents and enjoying the benefit of a long life.
It could easily have been the Definition of the Day.
Take your pick — they are both essential.
To ‘honor’ someone does not mean to flatter someone.
It doesn’t mean showering a person with platitudes.
Honoring doesn’t mean buttering up somebody.
Neither does it mean to bow down before a person like you might see someone who endeavors to honor a king.
No, the Greek word honor means to set a price on.
It means to estimate the value of³.
Honor is estimation — highly honoring means you have a high estimation.
Why should a child obey their parents?
Is it because the parents are bigger than the child and can force them into obedience?
No, this area starts with the Lord being the center of home life.
Honor starts with a child displaying honor to the Lord because they have been taught to value the Lord.
Children can have a right estimation of the Lord because they’ve been taught to value Him and know that He is especially important, vital, and necessary to life liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Parents are forming their children’s value system through Bible reading, prayer, church, and living the life in front of their kids.
Rightly valuing the Lord is part one of this equation.
Part two is a child learning the value of parents.
They have been taught to respect their parents because they have set a price and estimated their parents to be of worth.
A child learns to obey because it’s worth it.
You’ve learned that lesson as a Jesus follower.
You obey God because obedience doesn’t cost — it pays.
It’s worth it.
You learned that.
If you haven’t learned this yet, stay at it — you’ll get it.
So, a child learns to value God and do the same with their parents.
You obey because it’s worth it.
Thank God for god-fearing parents.
Children have their values right because the right values are modeled in the home – love and respect are on display.

Long and Prosperous Life: What If Things Are Not Going Well?

3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”

Verse three gives us a starting point to look to try to troubleshoot a life that is not going well.
How are things between you and your parents?
If your parents are righteous parents, that is they haven’t gotten off into sin, excess, and wrongdoing, then there is no excuse for a lack of respect.
There is no excuse for you to have a low estimation of the sacrifices that your parents have made in order to bring you up and give you a starting place in the world.
If things are not going well, start troubleshooting here.
Maybe you need to make a phone call, maybe you need to humble yourself and ask your parents for forgiveness.
Maybe you just need to flat-out repent before God.
But, since long life and prosperity are hanging in the balance, don’t you think it’s worth making the necessary adjustments?

Long and Prosperous Life: Instructions to the Parents

Don’t Relegate Your Responsibilities

Parents here are some admonitions in this area – please consider these.
First, do not relegate child-rearing to others.
It’s not the church’s responsibility to put God in your kids.
No, that’s your job.
And with that thought here is the Historical Background of the Day.
This background comes from David DeSilva, a New Testament scholar.
He wrote about ‘Education outside the Home.’

For the male children of modestly to more affluent families, education could take more formal features. For example, we might find a slave being purchased to serve as a schoolmaster for the children in the household. This schoolmaster would take care of the early childhood discipline of a son or a daughter, and when it came time for a son to acquire outside teachers and tutors, the schoolmaster would lead him to those teachers and back and make sure that he did the lessons that the tutor assigned—a slave acting more or less as a disciplinarian, partnering, if you will, with outside teachers and instructors. For citizens of a Greek or Roman city, this might lead to education in the gymnasium, which in this period was not just a place for exercise—although it certainly did prominently feature learning Greek games and toning up the body—but also it was a school, a place to learn grammar, logic, rhetoric, mathematics, astronomy, music, and the like. There would also be schools available in Jewish settings for the more elite families. The Wisdom of Ben Sira, one of the books of the Apocrypha, is in fact the written curriculum selected from what was taught in a school, a house of instruction in Jerusalem, around about 200–180 BC.⁴

So basically, if a person had money, they would relegate or contract out the raising of children.
I don’t know about you but somehow this practice doesn’t register as the best way to bring kids up.
What’s missing?
The example of the father for one.
A father in the home represents the Father God in heaven.
The necessary example of a godly father should never be underestimated.
No parents, it’s your job to raise your children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Other entities, like the church, are there to assist you not replace you.
Read the Bible to your kids.
Pray in the home and with your children.
Lead the way in God.

What If My Children Have Gone Astray?

Now, when we come to these verses, we have situations where a parent has raised their child in the nurture and admonition of the Lord and has provided the child with the proper foundation.
Yet they have veered off the path.
They’ve gone off into sin maybe — they have left the Lord — they’ve quit going to church.
What then?
Samson had godly parents who feared, trusted and obeyed the Lord.
They believed the angel of the Lord who told them their unborn son would deliver Israel from the Philistines.

Judges 13:3–5 (ESV) — 3 And the angel of the LORD appeared to the woman and said to her, “Behold, you are barren and have not borne children, but you shall conceive and bear a son. 4 Therefore be careful and drink no wine or strong drink, and eat nothing unclean, 5 for behold, you shall conceive and bear a son. No razor shall come upon his head, for the child shall be a Nazirite to God from the womb, and he shall begin to save Israel from the hand of the Philistines.”

Samson’s parents obeyed all of God’s commands concerning how to raise Samson as a Nazarite.
But Samson went astray.

Judges 16:1–4 (ESV) — 1 Samson went to Gaza, and there he saw a prostitute, and he went in to her. 2 The Gazites were told, “Samson has come here.” And they surrounded the place and set an ambush for him all night at the gate of the city. They kept quiet all night, saying, “Let us wait till the light of the morning; then we will kill him.” 3 But Samson lay till midnight, and at midnight he arose and took hold of the doors of the gate of the city and the two posts, and pulled them up, bar and all, and put them on his shoulders and carried them to the top of the hill that is in front of Hebron. 4 After this he loved a woman in the Valley of Sorek, whose name was Delilah.

He gave his strength to wrong women, ungodly souls — you know the hair-raising story of Samson and Delilah.
Samson went astray, it cost him his ministry and in the end, his life.
But in the end, he called on the Lord God.
How did he know to do that?
He knew it because his parents raised him in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
God had mercy on him, and in his death, he had greater success than in his life.
But, the point here is that his life was cut short because he didn’t properly respect or hold in high enough estimation the counsel of his parents.
Despite these failures, God still included Samson in his list of the Old Testament heroes of the faith.

Hebrews 11:32–34 (ESV) — 32 And what more shall I say? For time would fail me to tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, of David and Samuel and the prophets— 33 who through faith conquered kingdoms, enforced justice, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, 34 quenched the power of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, were made strong out of weakness, became mighty in war, put foreign armies to flight.

So parents take heart.
Hold to God’s Word.

Proverbs 22:6 (ESV) — 6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.

Now, Father God in the precious Name of Jesus, thank you for our children. They are blessings from your hand. We appreciate our children, and you for placing them in our charge. Give us the wisdom to know what to do, and how to do it where our kids are concerned. Help us to be the example of righteousness we should be. Teach us that we may teach them. We ask for your wisdom which we need in such a strong way in these days in which we live. We thank you for that and we give you all the glory and praise for everything that our children have done in you and for you, in Jesus’ Name, Amen.
How to Absolutely Guarantee a Long and Prosperous Life.
We we’ll see you next time for another edition of Light on Life.

What Does A Spiritually Mature Believer Look Like? – [James 1:1]

__________
References:

Judith Warner, “Kids Gone Wild,” The New York Times (November 27, 2005) ↩
Wuest ↩
BDAG ↩
David A. deSilva, NT201 The Cultural World of the New Testament, Logos Mobile Education (Bellingham, WA: Lexham Press, 2015). ↩

emeryhorvath.com

Equipping people to pursue God's glory

How to Absolutely Guarantee a Long and Prosperous Life on Planet Earth

Podcast: Light on Life Season Ten Episode Three

by Emery Horvath

Listen to the Audio

Click to Listen | Right Click to Download |Subscribe in PlayerFM

Read the Notes

Accept the Challenge

Join the Conversation

Episode Resources:

We are currently teaching in the book of Ephesians. You can click on the links below to listen to some of these podcasts.

About Emery

Subscribe to the Podcast

Share the Love

Podcast Notes

Prosperous Long Life: What The Scriptures Say

Submission and Authority and Long Life

Long and Prosperous Life: Being in Submission

Submission to the Great Commission

Long and Prosperous Life: Obey Your Parents

Start Right Away

Long and Prosperous Life: ‘For This Is Right’

Long and Prosperous Life: Honor and Long Life

Long and Prosperous Life: What If Things Are Not Going Well?

Long and Prosperous Life: Instructions to the Parents

Don’t Relegate Your Responsibilities

What If My Children Have Gone Astray?

Listen to the Audio

Click to Listen | Right Click to Download |Subscribe in PlayerFM

Read the Notes

Accept the Challenge

Join the Conversation

Episode Resources:

We are currently teaching in the book of Ephesians. You can click on the links below to listen to some of these podcasts.

About Emery

Subscribe to the Podcast

Share the Love

Podcast Notes

Prosperous Long Life: What The Scriptures Say

Submission and Authority and Long Life

Long and Prosperous Life: Being in Submission

Submission to the Great Commission

Long and Prosperous Life: Obey Your Parents

Start Right Away

Long and Prosperous Life: ‘For This Is Right’

Long and Prosperous Life: Honor and Long Life

Long and Prosperous Life: What If Things Are Not Going Well?

Long and Prosperous Life: Instructions to the Parents

Don’t Relegate Your Responsibilities

What If My Children Have Gone Astray?

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